Publishing Woes: What’s in a Name?

During my wonderful job, not only do I get to do a whole lot of writing, but I basically get to “window” shop for 8 hours a day. (Note: I’m a copywriter). For example, I just finished writing about about mattresses yesterday. My gosh… It was incredibly torturous to be so far away from my bed while I wrote about plush pillowtop mattresses, but then writing about mattresses that are better than mine sucked too. When I came home from work, I didn’t know if I wanted to finally curl up in bed or throw the smelly thing out my window.

Anyway, about a month ago, I was writing the copy that will appear on the customer reviews pages on the website. One of these page was, thankfully, books. More specifically in this situation, I was working on children’s books. In order to write my 200-word blurbs on what customers will find on our pages and in our reviews, I browsed to see what specific products and brands we carry. So for these children’s books, I came across a series that… well… made me question the creative minds of publishers and people in general:

Keep that sour look on your face, kid.

Keep that sour look on your face, kid.

Now, I’m all for education, expanding vocabularies and learning how to rhyme, but seriously?

Let’s come up with a list of kid friendly -uck words:
duck, pluck, stuck, truck, luck, muck, struck, buck, chuck, tuck, puck, pluck, yuck. (Did I miss any?)

Why? WHY, I ask. And I ask while I shake my fists in frustrated disbelief.

There are only so many G-rated -uck words before kids figure out the BIG ONE. Kids are smarter than you think, and I  think adults forget that. They’ll test out every letter of the alphabet and every sound they know when you set them up with a big chunk of the word like “-uck” or “-it.” (And yes, there is a book titled The -it Word Family). Why beat around the bush, huh? Let’s start ’em young, shall we? I mean, obviously there are a lot of factors that go into children learning inappropriate or curse words but c’mon. You have to agree that this is pretty much spoon-feeding it to them.

What else could I possible say about this except to ask, does this really exist in our world?

Yes. Yes, it does.

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